The Internet
Letters to Z Bone For 1996
BobSometimes Z Bone readers just want to flame me or tell me something without asking me anything. Others want to expunge their guilt by confessing to Z.

There is no claim by me that any of these e-mails relate to reality. The more interesting or thought provoking ones will be posted right here. Obvious shills will not, unless it's downright hilarious.

Submissions may be edited or shortened at Z Bone's discretion or lack thereof. If you do not want your name shown, please specify so in your e-mail.


Date: Thu, 03 Oct 1996 13:06:25
From: Scott Harrison <HarrisonSC@worldnet.att.net>
Subject: Suggestion

Great website providing a very valuable service! I'm sure it's difficult work, and I'm glad you're doing it.

How about a chart listing all the clubs with their four category ratings. This would make it easier to compare clubs and quickly find the clubs that offer what one is looking for, (all hot linked to each club's review).

Z:
This is a very good idea. There is absolutely nothing stopping me from implementing this on my web site... except for laziness. What I should do is keep my reviews in a large database and generate the HTML pages automatically when I change the ratings. In that way, all the areas where the ratings are located would be updated properly. Also a search engine for readers to use to find all clubs with a particular set of ratings would be implemented on my site.

Then I woke up and I was sitting in front of a CP/M Z-80 computer running at 2 MHz.

Then I woke up AGAIN from my nightmare only to realize my real life is not all that much better than my nightmare.

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Date: Wed, 2 Oct 1996 02:44:04
From: KWatson880@aol.com
Subject: Sehr fantastisch!

Hey, sorry about the somewhat pretentious greeting, but I have to give you credit for probably being the most candid reviewers of strippers on the web. Great work.
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Date: Tue, 3 Sep 1996 06:50:58
From: Marc
Subject: Body Shop Amateur Contest

It may be that the Body Shop won't live up to your recent predictions, but the amateur night is still something to see. It started about 11 or so, and I saw an hour of it (10 dancers). I have no idea how many more contestants there were, but they clearly were not finished when I had to leave.

The reason you should check this event out is that there were a couple of incredibly beautiful girls dancing, including 1 definite 10, a 9 and a couple of other serious cuties. (I am not prone to exaggerating these numbers. For your reference, while I agree with you that the GC has the best-looking girls in LA, I would reserve 9s for the 2-3 best looking girls I've seen at GC over the last year and I've never seen what I would call a 10 there.).

The DJ announced each of the girls' industry credits before they went on stage, and about half of them had or claimed to have had spreads in various magazines (Hustler, Players, etc.) and a few have purportedly appeared in more upscale venues (the Spice Channel, Playboy's Book of Lingerie, and in one case,a cheesecake role in an R-rated film starring Ice Cube). I know that these claims should not be taken at face value, but in at least two of the cases, I believe it because, as I've said, some of these women were incredible-looking.

The dark-haired girl with the film credit was the one to whom I'd give a 10. I didn't catch her name. Tall, perfectly shaped and proportioned, and a kind of radiant grace that clobbered me. She had a number of friends in the audience who hooted encouragement, but the hooting was contagious - others in the audience joined in and I was not the only guy in the club sporting an involuntary look of giddy astonishment.

A blonde named Brook was the one who claimed the Playboy's Book of Lingerie credit, and if she was lying, she certainly was cute enough for it to be true. Amazing skin.

Z:
When you offer $600 for first place, it's amazing what can happen.

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Date: Fri, 23 Aug 1996 22:03:56
From: Forskies@aol.com
Subject: Tropical Lei

I visited TL early August. What a dump!!! Tiny stage, bad lighting, terrible seating, laps o.k. The club reeked of B.O. I couldn't tell if it was from the clientele or the women. Had much better laps at DejaVu N.H. plus club is much classier. Keep up the good work. Great page.
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Date: Thu, 01 Aug 1996 16:20:19
From: wwilmot
Subject: <before busts>

Just spent a couple of weeks in LA and did your top 5 list among other things. Yes, Deja Vu got busted but for those of us who were there just before it was great. The combination of dancer looks and nasty factor beats the others. Tropical Lei was nasty but lacked in the looks category (which they made up for in darkness). All in all your list kept me busy evaluating quality experiences and out of a lot of kennels in the LA area.

Z:
Unfortunately, TL also just got busted, again (8/9). This time, they might be closed for a while. Keep an eye out for more gossip on Deja Vu on ASSC and in my gossip section,

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Date: Sat, 27 Jul 1996 19:08:17
From: skypilot@deltanet.com
Subject: Bisexual clubs!

Hi, Post this if you want. We're (my wife and I) a San Diego couple looking for a club in the LA area that has a Bi-sexual leaning, and mostly on the female side of things. My wife wants to meet a girl for some mutual (threesome) fun and games, and we're having a tough time finding a place to go that would increase our chances of meeting someone. Since there are clubs that cater to just about everything, is there one for us?

K & D
San Diego

Z:
Let me know if you find out any good info. You might checkout the Pussycat Club (see new review).

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Date: Fri, 26 Jul 1996 17:49:37
From: DougPad
Subject: ab2579 writeup in Rants and Raves

I am active in the legislative process in Sacramento. I think you misunderstand the assistance given to our cause by those who do not vote. that may be the best they can do. in both committee and on the senate floor, a bill passes only if it gets a majority of the votes for the entire committee. To pass the Senate, 21 positive votes are required. For example, a bill loses if the vote is 20 for; zero against. In a 15 member committee, 8 yes votes are needed to pass a bill.

Thus, a failure of a senator to vote is a way to defeat a bill without actually appearing to support "pornography". instead of chastising the absentees, we should be praising them. in several cases, i am quite close to the senators and know that they are opposed to AB2579. voting no by not voting is the best we can expect when they are subject to re-election and a hit piece that says they voted for "pornography" if they openly voted no on the bill.

i am in a similar position as a person active in the political process. my employer would summarily fire me if my name was ever publicly associated with opposition to AB2579. that doesn't mean that i can't find other ways to oppose it.

every card, letter, phone call, or e-mail that opponents can muster should be sent by August 31 to State Senators. on that date, the legislature is required to go home by the State Constitution. after that, the Governor has 30 days to sign all legislation enacted by the Legislature. Governor Wilson, who is proud of putting adult businesses out of business as Mayor of San Diego, is certain to sign the bill. If the bill is to be stopped, it must be stopped in the State Senate, which is controlled by the Democrats. The Republican dominated Assembly has already passed the bill.

certainly, you are correct in naming as our friends those that vote no, and the opponents of free speech and individual liberties are those who vote yes on the bill. but in the California legislature, i think an abstention is almost as good as a "no."

Z:
I see said the lap man. You aren't Pete Wilson, are you?

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Date: Thu, 25 Jul 1996 16:43:12
From: 3RDgenSOONER
Subject: Mermaid

Sometimes I feel like the "odd-man-out" when it comes to the subject of exotic dancing. Odd because I seem to be the only man who just likes to see beautiful women take off their clothes; not "finger their p**p shoots". I thought those were called "peep-shows" anyway................

Well, I dropped in on the Mermaid the other night and was very impressed. The dancers were attractive and NOT overly nasty. The club is simply in a first rate building and in a great area. My only complaint is that I can't order a real drink and look at someone in the buff..... very odd to me that I can't be an adult in this "free country". My only other complaint is that I arrived too early as a woman named "Devin" was applying and will start this Friday - I have never seen a better looking Asian woman in my life...anywhere!

Oh well, I feel better now....Your page is awesome ! Keep up the good work and remember those of us who like it "clean but HOT"

Z:
Don't worry. There are many like you. Frankly, I've gotten burned out on nasty stuff and prefer the kindler, gentler stuff.

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Date: Tue, 9 Jul 1996 00:24:40
From: JoaquimZ
Subject: Out of Town Clubs

Recommendations:
  1. Dallas:
    Dallas has several classy, full bar, topless "Gentlemen's Clubs", but now it has an innovative twist. The Nude BYOB club. By not serving alcohol, just setups, they can allow full nude performances. In particular, The Clubhouse, just off the Northwest Hiway, is a great place to spend an evening. Pick up a bottle of your favorite spirit or bring in a six pack. The dancers perform at your table (too bad, no laps, but lots of close ups). Additionally, they have a stage at just the right height so that as you walk up to tip a dancer, guess where one's nose goes...).
  2. Atlanta:
    Another mecca of topless and nude bars. However, the top clubs are pricy and the girls a bit snooty. Try the Pink Poodle, a bit north of town. Full nude and full bar, plus for $25. hour, a velvet lined private room. No serious contact, but considerable mild touching...foot massages etc. Better than the classic Gold Club for my money, especially if Jennifer is there.
  3. Orlando:
    It has to be Rachel's in Casselbury. The best combination of nude-full bar-good food-gorgeous dancers-$5.00 table dances and safety, although not-very-nasty table dances. Time passes very quickly and not very expensively at Rachels. Many times I stop in for a drink after dinner and before I realize it it's 2:00 am....my vote for best in the U.S. Rachel's also features a tough, lady manager who really run's the show well.

Z:
For my money, I'd rather drive to Tampa from Orlando.

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Date: Sat, 13 Jul 1996 22:04:03
From: seadoo
Subject: Hope you are well

Hope you have not died. Other than a few posting in ASSC, you have vanished. Hope things are going well. You still have one of the better WWW pages

Z:
Although I have had similar accusations from girls, as far as I know, I am still alive. Thanks for your concern.

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Date: Mon, 1 Jul 1996 23:45:57
From: Mednytedoo
Subject: Thanks for the excellent info.

I found your web page some time ago and I have to tell you that I have referred to it often. I thank you for such an excellent review of the clubs.

I have been to clubs all up and down the coast in Southern California. From Dream Girls in S.D. to L.A. clubs like Industrial Strip and Deja Vu in N. Hollywood, and your reviews are always right on the mark.

The main reason that I am e-mailing you is that just for kicks I agreed to accompany one of my friends to Bob's Classy Lady over the weekend and got turned off before I even made it in. Two of the most RUDE bouncers greeted our group at the turnstile. We were ready to drop some serious cash but could not believe that they would charge a lady their usual cover of $15.

There were a total of five people in our group, four of us were men willing to pay the cover but they were so concerned with charging the beautiful lady that was with us, that we decided to go elsewhere. If the management of this club had any brains or business sense, they would have met our groups deal of four paying customers (men @ $15 x 4 = $60). Instead they lost all $60 plus the unknown amount that we ended up spending down the street at Deja Vu. The beautiful lady that was with us would have probably enhanced the inside of this club even with all of her clothes on, yet they were to blind to see that.

Once again, thank you for the great advice and keep up the awesome work.

Z:
I can understand your point of view. However, you have to understand that the reason for the turnstile is to keep the workers there from letting people in for free. You are right that their policy should be changed regarding females but that's not up to the cashier who doesn't have the power to make that kind of a decision.

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Date: Sun, 30 Jun 1996 17:35:13
From: Kaylee
Subject: Star Garden Review

I was just browsing through your reviews of different clubs in the LA area when I came across your review of Star Garden.

Come on..it really isn't that bad. You must have been in on an off night. As a four year employee of the club, I will say that it's had it's share of ups and downs,but overall the club has maintained a decent reputation. I realize that you write your reviews to cater to the patron, not other dancers, but I think that you came down a little too hard on your review.

Star Garden is on of the few remaining topless clubs in the valley. Unfortunately the dime a dance nude clubs have been growing like weeds and the valley is now saturated with getting more for less. For someone like myself who doesn't mind dancing, but feels as though complete nudity and tabledancing would compromise my morals, there aren't many places left to work. I feel as though out of all the topless clubs left Star Garden is by far the best, and believe me I've worked at most of them at one time or another.

Most of the women at the club are very attractive and are skilled at entertaining.. not grinding on a man until****. That's fine for people who enjoy that kind of entertainment, but there are still men left in this world who enjoy leaving a little left to the imagination. I hope that you will come in and re-review the club...and feel free to stop by when I'm working.

Z:
OK. I will take your challenge and visit again. See you there.

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Date: Tue, 28 May 1996 14:41:01
From: LiberalDen@aol.com
Subject: Great stuff.

Hey buddy, great web page I love cruising the strip joints. Me and my friends go all the time. But it's very rare that I get a great lap dance due to the fact that I'm in a wheelchair and you know it's HARD for them to really do it LOL. Actually the best one I had was in Ecstasy by Candy, man she really climbed hehe. I was wondering maybe if you could add to the reviews the ACCOMODATIONS (sic) made by the strippers in each club, for people like me LOL. Of course you'd have to ask them, hey keep up the good work see you in HEAVEN or HELL, hehe.

Z:
I think I'd rather see you in a strip club.

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Date: Thu, 16 May 1996 19:04:51
From: Vladimir Tomberg <vlad@infonet.ee>

Thank for the interesting information on your sheets. I Vladimir Tomberg from Tallinn, Estonia. I present interests of firms, which sell from Estony Streaptise (sic)Dancers. Me interests, where it is possible to receive E-mail address of the owners of Striptease Clubs. I shall be very grateful, if you will answer me. My address vlad@infonet.ee

P.S. Excuse for my bad English.

Z:
Anybody that wants to help him, please e-mail him directly.

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Date: Mon, 13 May 1996 14:02:51
From: Chris
Subject: kitty yung

I recently visited your LA nightclub website, which was thorough and impressive. I'm hoping you're the man to help me with a question. I've heard a rumor that adult filmstar Kitty Yung dances at a club somewhere in SoCal. I'm a big fan of hers, and would love to go see her, if this is true. If you could confirm it, or check into it for me, I'd be very grateful.

Z:
You're not a "follower" or stalker are you? Just kidding. Unfortunately, I've never heard of her so I wouldn't recognize her if she was doing a lap for me right now. You might try posting to alt.sex.movies and asking them there. Anybody know her out there? Hello?

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Date: Fri, 10 May 1996 06:32:18
From: Jim
Subject: Following home...

I have a favorite dancer at a certain club in the valley. She's not only been very giving, but also fun to talk to.

She was followed home by some jerkoff and things are not the same. My latest lap wasn't half as good as it was before she was followed. Now, this pretty, young Lady, will probably lose me as a regular because she's all worked up about this. I don't blame her! Those of you that are regulars have to stop that bullsh*t.

She's just a regular girl. I've told you about her in previous un-publishable EMail. If you can give me some advice on how to make her feel comfortable with me, again, I'd appreciate it. I know her well enough from the club, but not anywhere outside. She, understandably, doesn't trust anyone that clubs it.

I guess I just want a friend back. Sure, she dove after the laps, but she had a goal...to start a business. Something you don't see in dancers. They just, generally, wanna support their habit.

Followers...
Don't do it! Let the girls be your dream on stage, or on your lap. Don't follow them home, You screw it up for all of us. Some of us have our favorites and followers drive 'em out. That sucks for us.

Z:
I hope there aren't too many "followers" or "stalkers" reading my web site but you never know. If you are a stalker reading this, please stop it. Thanks for your cooperation. While we're at it, all rapists and murderers, stop it too.

On the serious side, let's face it. It's just not safe anywhere anymore. This warning can go to dancers and customers alike. Be careful out there. Play safe.

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Date: Sat, 20 Apr 96 18:23:03
From: Mark
Subject: Top 5

Try TJ's Show Girls on Beach Blvd. in Buena Park. No alcohol, but you will catch my drift after your first private dance.

Z:
By the "Subject", I suspect that you think that TJ's should be on the Top 5 list. I agree that TJ's has a high nasty factor and the price is right. However, as I have tried to explain previously, my Top 5 list is NOT the top 5 nastiest clubs in LA. They are the clubs that I like and the reasons are described. The reasons may NOT have anything to do with nasty dances. Please read it carefully.

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Date: Thu, 18 Apr 96 00:58:11
From: Philip
Subject: Other bars.

These are some other clubs to try in the Los Angeles County:
1. Fantasy Island, Santa Monica, bikini only.
2. Hollywood A-go-go, North Hollywood, bikini only.
3. Thirsty's, Sepulveda - topless.

Also, try Pacer's, now called Ortiz in Tijuana, Mexico, on the 5th floor of a parking structure...Great couch dances by American students from UC San Diego who crosses the border to work.

Z:
Fantasy Island is reviewed on my web page. Never been to Hollywood A-go-go or Thirsty's. Hmmm. Ortiz in TJ sounds very interesting. Laps by UC San Diego students, eh? Maybe it's time to expand my reviews to other countries.

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Date: Wed, 17 Apr 1996 12:37:15
From: <85170@teched.ans.net>
Subject: Thanks

Used your info to visit Bob's Classy Ladies. Fake breasts, but great show by Ruby, nice muscles.

Sending from Microsoft's TechEd event. Used their Exchange booth to search for your site, printed info, had a good time. Technology's great.

Thanks again.

Z:
Isn't technology great? Even Microsoft can help find good strip clubs.

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Date: Fri, 12 Apr 1996 12:05:42
From: Rocket Scientist <rocket@primenet.com>
Subject: Duh...

Time to update your page please!!

I luv your page...

For a real waste of bandwidth visit http://www.primenet.com/~rocket

Z:
If you look at his web site, you'll get an idea of how wild and crazy this guy is. I luv it.

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Date: Fri, 05 Apr 1996 19:15:45
From: msage
Subject: Your taste and mine

I just came back from Tropical Lei....about the size of my garage...most of the women were very ordinary, roubenesque,...fat even.

Then went to Deja Vu in Ontario...dead...maybe 3 guys and me...girls again look ordinary and fat...I wouldn't want them even near my lap.

Finally went to Sahara III in city of Industry...classy place but the girls had such a "I'm bored stiff" look that even though some were nice looking I got turned off because I know that a lap dance with them is going to be the same...I also notice that the DJ cut the music short and finally what drove me out was the waitress hitting me up for another drink every 5min...I'm not kidding.

Last night I went to the Industrial Strip...I liked it..stayed for over 3 hrs and had two lap dances...expensive but worth it because the girls were hot and you could tell they really enjoyed working there.

Z:
I guess this is an indirect way of telling me that Industrial rules. Industrial is not as nice looking as Bare, smaller than Bob's, not as glitzy as Deja Vu (N. Hollywood), not as nasty as Tropical Lei, better looking dancers at the Gentlemen's Club. Any questions?

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Date: Sun, 10 Mar 1996 22:13:19
From: Agent UFO
Subject: Report from the field: Ecstasy in Orange County

Club had much nicer attitudes since last time, and since after last visit which was made after remodeling from old Paddy Murphy days.

The girls stayed and talk for a long time, like they do at Captain Creme's, although maybe more so. Got two couch dances. One girl gave me her personal beeper number and the other one did full French kissing (like the old pre-AIDS days at the Tropicana.) Don't expect this though as the other one didn't and I imagine only if the girl really likes the customer.

Anyway, it was a real surprise to say the least. I think everyone's attitude there has improved since the owner opened up the ripoff non-nasty Mermaids in Newport Beach. Maybe the girls feel less pressure, I don't know. Mermaids is a mammoth lose by the way. Avoid at all costs.

There was also a "double trouble" consisting of four girls performing lesbian acts on the Ecstasy stage in mostly-nude. I initiated them into this by asking one of them to do the double-trouble since it is an advertised feature of Ecstasy. It took her about 15 minutes to arrange.

First she cleared it with the DJ (who sometimes says no) and then she got a friend or two involved. Later she came over and talked about doing it.

Club is now, in my opinion, way up there, one of the best in California I've been to. Girls look much prettier than last visit just 3 months ago...

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Letters -- 1996, 1997

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