Z Bone Zone

Dancer FAQ's Answered

There are many questions in the world of strip clubs but I seem to get the same ones a lot. I have collected questions regarding strip clubs, clubbing, dancers, and even this website, and put them into this FAQ page.  There's no way that I can cover everything here but it's a good way for you to get started in getting to know more about this industry and subject matter.

Please check here and read carefully before you send me e-mail asking about something already answered.

Thanks for conserving bandwidth on the Internet.

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Where can I get more info on features?

For schedules of features, try:
avninsider.com/html/ontheroad.shtml
thefloatingworld.com

If you need fan club type information, try these web sites:
pornstar-address-book.com/html/excal/satelite/star/starlet2.htm
www.rame.net/aarle/performers.html

If you want to read some porn gossip and industry info, try:
adultvideonews.com
ainews.com
lukeford.com
geneross.com
unchain.com

If you still can't find what you want, checkout the newsgroups:
rec.arts.movies.erotica (moderated)
alt.sex.movies

Moreover, the above newsgroup has an official website (www.rame.net) which includes a impressive FAQ with everthing you ever wanted to know about porno, a full database of movies, including most of the adult actress websites and email addresses.

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How can I meet a feature?

Go to one of the strip clubs that offer feature dancers, wait for her to come off stage to sign autographs, pay for a Polaroid picture and start talking quickly because there will be a line behind you. Although I have gotten lap dances from features, usually, they are overpriced for what you get. Unless you really, really, want to get a lap from your favorite feature, it's not worth the extra price you have to pay.

Alternatively, go to the Consumer Electronics Show (CES) in January in Las Vegas. All the big name stars are there every year. FREE autographs, FREE pictures, FREE chatting. But expect to stand in long lines for the big name features. In years past, there were a lot of flashing but now the flashing is a little more discreet so you have to wait around and watch carefully.

You can also see your favorite feature at the Erotica LA show which usually takes place in June each year at the Convention Center. It's smaller than CES but most of the local talent shows up and since they are not the big names, they tend to be friendlier to the fans. Because of the strict LA laws, don't expect to see ANY flashing at this show.

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How do we book features for our club?

Try contacting the following booking agencies:

Agenda Entertainment (818) 789-6917
Continental Booking Agency (813) 363-7100
Girls, Girls, Girls (707) 460-9667
www.girlsagent.com
The Lee Network (305) 941-3340
Showtime Management (954) 423-4256
www.americanadultstars.com
Teasers Entertainment (310) 318-6889
Universal Entertainment (617) 396-6832
Wide World Entertainment (305) 351-1014

I've never dealt directly with any of these companies so please let me know how they are if you end up using them.

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How do we book features for a private show?

The easiest way would be to talk to them directly at a club that they are featuring at. Many non-big name features will do parties and private shows. However, keep in mind that if they are popular, they will charge accordingly. The going rate seems to be about $400 per hour.

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Where can I find Asian dancers?

This is one of my most FAQs and some people came up to the plate with answers, which is saved in the Best of ZBB.

Rick Jordan re-posted his "Ho Chi Minh Trail, The Clubs" post about no less than 9 Asian clubs in Long Beach a while back. Click here to read it. Note that some of these clubs maybe KIA by now.

Bill Flanagan (email) says RJ's list is outdated. He says, "Asian Nights is gone, city opened a police substation across the street. Shanghai Mike's closed a couple of years ago. Ace of Hearts is closed last year, owner Malinda opened a straight (and nice) dinner house in Bellflower. Kim Diamonds closed several years ago, entire block has been leveled. The strip club Angel's is still cooking down the street, however."

Speaking of Long Beach Asain clubs, Linda Lee's Barracuda now has a website at lindalees.com (down). There are pictures of Asian dancers (and even Linda) on the website.

Reporter Bluenote has compiled an extensive list of Asian dancers at various clubs: Century, Exotica, Sahara, Sahara 3, and Fritz 2. Click here to read the juice. This guy has done his homework. Hard work but somebody's gotta do it.

There is also an event called Asian Model Palooza where Asian models and Asian adult video stars come together for a signing and a little stage dancing. Get more info on their website at asianmodelpalooza.com.

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Where can I find African-American dancers?

There are 3 clubs in Gardena that have many black dancers. I've been to all three in the early 90's, which is too long for me to do a fair review. However, here are the addresses and phone numbers:

First King
14401 S. Western
Near 44th
(310) 532-5801

Ron's Barbary Coast
14320 S. Western
(310) 532-3406

Starz
2528 Rosecrans Ave.
(310) 327-2796

You might also want to check out:
Charlie's Live Enterainment
3140 West Florence Avenue
(323) 971-9021

There is another bikini club in OC (?) that I've been to many years ago which was much smaller than the above clubs but cozy. If anybody knows which club I'm talking about, please e-mail me.

For the more adventurous readers, you might try the underground black clubs "Cool EXscape" at Crenshaw & Lennox and "Lee Max's" at Western & 189th.

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Where can I find hot Latin dancers?

There are several clubs with a few Latin dancers but frankly, it's hard to tell by looks sometimes. For topless, checkout Sam's Hof Brau which has many Mexican and Brazilian dancers (especially during the day shift) and so does Fort Knox. For nude, checkout PlayPen. Nicole sent me a list of latina girls who work at Spearmint Rhino (Industry) as of August 2001: Nicole, Dominique, Sugar, Electra, Natalie, Julie, Rena, Alyssa, Vanessa, Joy, Venus and Diamond.

If you want to check out some young bikini chicas, you might try:

  • Alameda Strip in downtown with stage dancing, lap dancing and full bar.
  • San Antoni Rose at 4505 S. Downey Rd. (323) 588-8288 (Map). There is no stage there but lap dancing is available starting at $1.

RJ mentions them in his report of Asian clubs in Long Beach. He basically says to stay away. I think you might actually have better luck at some of the hostess clubs or a regular dance club. If anybody has more information, please e-mail me.

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How do I find out if a specific dancer is working?

A few clubs have the dancer's schedules online on their website but most do not.  You can call the club and ask. However, some employees at clubs will lie just to get you to come to the club. You will only find out from trial and error if this is the case. Personally, I think that's a bad practice because it only gets the customer mad. To improve your chances of getting an accurate answer on the phone, next time you are at the club, find out from the dancer what is a good way at that particular club and who you may need to ask to talk to on the phone to get the information.

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How much should I tip the dancers?

Tipping is optional. But like at restaurants, it's pretty much taken for granted that you tip the dancers. My general rule of thumb is, if you are sitting on stage, tip at least $1 per song. If you don't want to spend that much, sit off stage and enjoy the show from there. If you like a particular dancer and want to get her attention, then tip at least double what everybody else is tipping. Normally $5 - $10 should get her attention. More if you can afford it.

For private or one-on-one dances, it's good to know how much the dancer gets to keep. Most of my reviews tell you how much the club takes. At a club where the dancer has to pay the club a lot of money per song, it's nice to tip extra above the stated price per song. For example, I may tip an extra $5 for a $20 or $30 lap dance if I thought she was very good.

If you are planning on returning to this club and seeing the same dancer again, tip extra and she'll remember the next time. If you are not planning on returning (from out of town), you will want to tip her BEFORE the end of your private dance so that she knows you are a good tipper.

Normally, dancers will only start to do some good dancing after you get at least 2 dances. If you don't get more for each dance, I would stop. The smart dancers will do some extras right at the end of each song to entice you to get another one. If that's the only time she does extras, forget it and quit there.

Basically, it's simple. The bigger the bill, the better the thrill.

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OK, but when do I tip her?

For stage tipping at a nude club, I would suggest that you put up at least a dollar as soon as the dancer comes on stage. This will lure her to you and if you like what you see, you can tip her more and she will stay in front of you. For stage tipping at a topless club, if you want the dancer to dance directly in front of you, tip while she is dancing. If not, she will probably come around after her set and indicate to you to tip her before she leaves the stage.

For private and lap dances, depending on the club, the dancer may ask you to tip her before the dancing starts. This is for her protection in case you forgot to bring your wallet. After the first dance, if she saw the money in your pocket, she may elect to dance and get paid later. The club policy is usually to ask the customer to pay first. However, most dancers will elect to get paid after the dance, hoping to get extra tips. In any case, make sure that you and the dancer agree to the price before starting your dances.

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What is a tipout?

Although this sounds like something a customer has to give the dancer, this is actually money that the dancer has to pay the house (the club) for the privilege of working there. This can be anywhere from nothing to $130 per shift in LA. This fee is also called "stage fee" at some clubs because the dancer is "renting" the stage from the club. The tipout can also include a portion of the lap/table dance money that the dancer has made. This can vary from 0% to 50%.

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How much do dancers make?

This can vary greatly depending on the location, club, and physical attributes and mental attitude of the dancer. How much the dancer actually takes home (net) from what she makes (gross) is also affected by the tipout to the club (which varies from nothing to $130+).

Typically, an average dancer at a small to medium topless club will average $50 - $200 net. The average nude dancer will net about $150 - $400 depending on the type of club. If the club does not emphasize private or laps, the amount will be on the lower side. In clubs where all the money is made via laps, the numbers can be much higher. A good looking but nasty dancer who can hustle drinks, and laps all night can average $300 - $600 net.

But keep in mind that few dancers work more than 3 to 4 days a week, if even that. Many dancers experience dancer burnout and cannot work for weeks at a time. They will often take very expensive vacations to recharge their batteries. Also, there are expenses (e.g., costumes, tanning, makeup, nails) and there is very little job security in the industry. It's not unusual for a dancer to be fired and be out of work for several weeks.

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What is a "regular" customer?

Normally, this indicates that the customer visits a particular club a lot. Depending on the dancer, this may be a good thing or a bad thing. Regular customers usually enter the club without paying and hang out for long periods of time. They will also help dancers by bringing them food or giving them rides. However, the money making dancers know that most regulars do not tip very much, if at all. Most regulars feel that they do not need to tip since they are, well, regulars. This is clearly how one can tell if a dancer is a type 1, 2 or 3 depending on how she relates to a regular.

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How often would I have to visit to be a regular?

It would depend on how active you are and when you visit the club, but I would say a minimum of once a week. If you are quiet and come when it's busy, you'd have to visit much more often. If you come when it's dead and talk to everyone or spend a ton of money, once a week would be enough.

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How do I become a dancer's customer?

Being a dancer's customer (a.k.a. tipper or regular), usually means that this customer normally only tips one particular dancer. Depending on the dancer, this could simply be a customer that comes in and only gets laps with one dancer or in extreme cases, a customer that only talks to one dancer. As for how to become one, it really is up to the customer to purposely favor just one dancer. If a customer tips all or most of the dancers at a club, he would not be considered anybody's tipper. Obviously, the bigger you tip, the more attention you would get from the dancer in question. However, be very careful in this regard because this is a sure way to start some DP (dancer politics) and get in some big trouble.

Before you rush out to become a dancer's regular, read the next FAQ below.

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How do I stop being a dancer's regular?

This is an excellent question. I have been in that situation several times. I've even had situations where I went to another club to avoid the dancer and she moved to the new club and I was in the same situation once again.

Generally speaking, there is no real graceful way of unbecoming a dancer's tipper. At a lap club (e.g. TL), I would transition to doing less dances with her and more and more with others or another specific dancer. I've had times when I stopped lapping with the dancer completely and started with a new dancer. In this case, the "old" dancer got the message but if I ever got to the club when my "new" dancer wasn't there yet or had left, the "old" dancer would pounce on me. I've tried other methods like still talking to her but not getting dances, tipping her on stage but not laps, etc. Sometimes it works OK, other times it still costs money.

The bottom line is, there is no free lunch.  Once you become a regular, it's hard to un-do it without somebody getting a little hurt or pissed off.

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How do I get rid of a dancer permanently?

I get email from customers that became infatuated with a dancer, then later "dumped" by her and became despondent. Some extreme cases have considered suicide. Personally, I don't think this has much to do with dancers, and more to do with the customers questionable mental state and the same situation could have happened with any female that this person got involved with. My attitude on this is, just move on with your life. There are plenty of other women in the ocean.

Many years ago on ASSC, I wrote a sarcastic, but frighteningly realistic reply article to try to make one of these people realize how crazy he was sounding to the rest of us. If you are not easily offended, click here to read how you can really get rid of a dancer. Again, please be aware that the article is very offensive. Don't say I didn't warn you.

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How do I make those origami folded money?

It's too hard to explain how to do origami in words and I'm not about to do folding diagrams here. The best thing to do is to purchase a book called The Buck Book by Anne Akers Johnson which I have used. This book shows you how to make rings, a frog, elephant (my favorite), peacock and more. The book even comes with a real dollar bill, in case you don't have one handy.

There is another book called Money Folding (Origami Favorites Series) by Florence Temko and V'Ann Cornelius but I do not own this book.

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What's the etiquette when a girl wants to sit with you?

If I am interested in the girl, I will offer a drink to let her know that I am not a clown. If I am not interested, I will tell her that I don't mind her sitting with me and chatting but I am not interested in laps. Often, that will be her cue to walk away. No big loss, I talk enough already. If she elects to stay and chat, that's OK with me. I won't feel like an ass later when she finally gets around to asking me. Sometimes they will stay and chat hoping to change your mind about the dance. The only downside to this is it keeps the other dancers away while you are sitting with her. So little time, so many laps.

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How much do I tip after just talking to a dancer?

Before I answer this question, you must keep in mind that by paying for the dancer to talk to you, you are encouraging her to do so again in the future. If this is exactly what you are trying to do, then by all means tip well. But if that is not your intention, do not tip her or she will continue to return to chat with you in the future.

Now, having said that, the answer to this question will depend on the exact situation you are in. If you are a club where you will never be returning to (e.g. you are out of town on vacation or business trip), it really doesn't matter what you do. Tip if you want to be nice.

If you are at a club that you frequent, or think will be one you will return to soon, you might tip well to advertise to her, and other girls she talks to, that you are not a chump. If this particular dancer is somebody that you are interested in, you should tip well so that she has a good impression of you and to encourage her to come chat with you again on your next trip.

The actual amount to tip should take into consideration the following factors:

  1. Type of club (nude, topless/bikini).
  2. Cost of lap dances at the club.
  3. How much you want to impress.

You need to tip more at nude clubs than topless/bikini clubs. Obviously, at a club where lap dances are only $10, you can tip less than where they are $50 per song.  My recommendation would be to tip at least the cost of a lap dance, no matter what the other factors are.  Anything less will have no effect on the dancer so you might as well not tip at all.  There's no maximum but tipping the same amount as getting lap dances would be generous enough to get any dancer's attention.

If you really want to impress, you should over-tip to ensure that the dancer remembers you the next time you come in.  A common baller technique is to over-tip on a prior trip before coming in with a big posse.  That way, when you come in with your big group, you'll get a lot of attention from the girl from the previous trip.

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What's the polite way of asking how much dances are?

If I'm really interested in getting one, I just come right out and ask. You're not asking for her weight, it's just business.

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How much are lap dances?

Lap and private dance prices vary depending on the club and dancer. Some clubs charge as little as $10, while others go up to $50 or more per song. An important thing to note is that some clubs allow the dancers to set the price. This is important to the customer since you may have danced with one dancer who charges only $10 while another dancer may charge more at the same club.

This practice is very common in many strip clubs. Personally, if the dancer does not tell me in advance that she is charging more than the "club rate", I will assume that it is the normal rate. However, this is not good practice unless you are familiar with the dancer. If a dancer dances first, then tells you that her dances are more than the club price, you could complain to the management. However, I don't know if one would get favorable results from this. Generally speaking, the management tends to side with their workers on many issues and it's usually a lost cause.

A good rule of thumb is to double-check the dance prices with the dancer before starting the dances. Moreover, many dancers will try to "cheat" on the count so I will ask her to count the number of dances as we go along. Many will forget after a few dances and I will have to count for the dancer, out loud.

Strip clubs have come a long way compared to where they were 15 years ago but they are still not anywhere close being like normal businesses when it comes to customer service and satisfaction. Such tactics will continue to cause the industry to have a bad name in the eyes of the general public.

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How long are the lap dance songs?

The length of the songs can vary greatly from club to club. Generally, for a lap factory (a club which is geared towards selling lap dances, always nude), the length will be anywhere from 2 minutes to 3 minutes. When these clubs have "specials", they can be much shorter. I've seen 6 for 1 specials where each song was about 15 seconds, just long enough for the DJ to play the next song.

At non-lap factories (topless or bikini clubs), the songs can be longer, from 3 minutes to 4 or more minutes.

Also, keep in mind that at some clubs, the length of the songs are determined by the DJ on shift, while at most, the club dictates the length of the songs.  Once exception is Deja Vu (Ontario) which has vending machines that determine the length of the songs.

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Can I get a discount for more than one song?

Some clubs offer that automatically during their "sale" when they try to get customers to get laps. Some clubs even offer 6 for 1 discounts. But be aware that they cut the songs so that the actual total time is not much more than the regular amount.

Other clubs don't offer discounts. Some dancers will offer a discount without you asking. Here's how I look at this topic. Usually, if you like the dancer, other customers probably like her too. This means she doesn't have to make deals. Economics works in strip clubs too. Others many disagree on this, but I NEVER haggle on the price. If her price is crazy, I just don't get a dance from her. I figure if I haggle, she will think I'm cheap and not give me a good dance anyway. Why waste my time and money on bad dances?

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How do I find a good lap dancer?

In some clubs, there are seats that will allow you to observe the goings on in the private booths or couch dances. Find these locations and sit and observe for a while. Don't stare too much or the dancer will get paranoid. Watch the stage and glance over once in a while to see what she's doing. This is a good way to find out which dancers do good laps or privates. Some general rules to follow before getting laps are:

  1. NEVER get a blind lap. This means, you should never get a lap from a dancer without seeing her do a lap for another customer. At the minimum, watch her dance on stage and see if she knows how to be sexy. But sexy dances on stage do not always equal nasty dances.
     
  2. Don't believe any fantastic stories the dancer tells you before the dance. "My lap dances are the nastiest in the WORLD!" Sure and I'm going to give you my credit card.
     
  3. Try to establish some type of connection with the dancer before getting your laps. This can be done by talking to her briefly after her set on stage and a little before your lap. If the club allows for you to "buy drinks for the lady", buy one and talk to her. By getting her to get to know you a bit, she will feel a little more comfortable about cheating for you during your laps.
     
  4. Don't ask if you can do something illegal or against club rules. Although in some cases, dancers who don't care about getting busted or fired may give you the answer you want, most savvy dancers will not answer "Yes" to a question that could get them busted by vice cops or fired by club management.  After you get in the booth, slowly see how far the dancer will let you go.
     
  5. If you get to talk to the dancer, ask the dancer where she has worked before. If this is her first dancing job and she just started, forget any laps from her. It takes a while to learn how to do good laps. If she tells you she worked at a club which you know has nasty laps, ask her why she quit. If she says because they were too nasty, you may be in trouble. Otherwise, if she liked the other club, you are OK.
     
  6. When you are observing the dancer doing laps for another customer, keep your eyes open for some of the following types of action that would indicate a nasty lapper:
    • The dancer faces away from the customer and puts her hand or hands behind her back for a few seconds or her hands have this type of motion when she turns around.
       
    • When the dancer is facing the customer and grinding, her hand is on her top and you see the customers head move or her arms move slightly.
       
    • When the dancer is standing on the couch (only some clubs allow this), watch to see if the customer's head moves forward or back when the dancer bends over.
       
    • The dancer spends a lot of time on her knees facing the customer between his legs.
       
    • The dancer is on her hands and knees 90 degrees turned relative to the customer and her body is very low to the couch.
       
    • The dancer changes her position quickly when the floater or bouncer walks by.
       
    • The customer has a big stupid grin on his face for the whole song.

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Who can I ask about high mileage lappers?

You might try asking the waitress after you tip her good. I've noticed that this works less and less as the clubs seem to become more like a factory. In the good old days, the waitress would be friends with the best money makers but not any more. You can forget about asking the floaters, security or DJs unless you have gotten to know them. They don't know if you are vice so they aren't going to tell you crap. The best way is to get to know the people at your favorite club and the "word" will come to you.

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What should I wear for lap dances?

Regardless of the type of dances you will be getting (laps or bed), I suggest you wear shorts or at least thin and smooth material pants (or loose sweat pants) to get the full effect. Do NOT wear Levi pants because this type of material is too rough for the dancers to rub against and some will object to it.

There are a few clubs that do not let you wear shorts or at least, no short shorts. You can usually get away with wearing walking shorts, especially if you pull them down low so that the bottom appears to be below your knees.

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Am I allowed to c*m during a lap dance?

Although there's nothing stopping you from doing so, I would let the dancer know because she might not be expecting it. At some clubs, this type of behavior is expected and the dancer would not be surprised. In fact, she might tell you to go to the bathroom and put a condom on before starting the lap dance. However, at other clubs, the dancer might get mad and walk away just for asking.

For people who find condoms uncomfortable, you might try checking out lapdanceliner.com (down)

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Can a dancer have an orgasm during a lap dance?

Depending on the type of lap dances that are available and the dancer you are with, it is possible. I've talked to several dancers who have said that they have had this experience. One dancer told me that it is even possible (on rare instances) for her to orgasm on stage during her set if she is in the right mood (and probably the right drugs).

Having said that, it is more likely than not, that the dancer is faking it.

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What does a dancer mean when she says, "You can get comfortable"?

In peek booths, private rooms or booths in strip clubs, and modeling studios, the dancer will often use this term to mean that it is alright for you to expose your penis and masturbate. The reason for using this phrase is because it would be illegal for her to tell you to masturbate if you happen to be a vice cop. However, by using that term, if you should decide to interpret it in that way, she is not responsible.

Just don't get too used to whipping it out when you hear this phrase in case your boss says it during a meeting.

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How do I pick the dancer I want and discourage others?

Discouraging others can simply done by looking uninterested when they walk by. Some will come over anyway so you simply have to say "No thank you" in a nice way. Unfortunately, the other dancers will see that you are saying "No" to dancers. This will make the other dancers keep away from you. That's good, you say? That's good except for that one or 2 that you DO want to get a dance from. They won't ask you either.

The question that is being eluded to is: What's a good way to let a dancer know that you are interested?

Answer:
If she is not busy, just looking at her and smiling will get their attention most of the time. If you can get her to look at you, just wave her over. If not, just walk right up to her and say hello. Unlike the "real world", it's easy to get dancers to come over to talk to you, that's their job. Just don't look unapproachable. Look happy, open and ready to talk.

If the dancer is with a customer, it's a little trickier. It's rude to interrupt a dancer talking to a customer. Some of the more popular ones will go from regular customer straight to regular customer (not to mention others that run after them) and you will not get a chance to talk to them. Obviously, if they walk near you, you can wave them down.

If they never get close to where you are, the only 2 other options are: Wait until they go on stage, tip big and when they pickup their tips from you, ask them to come over for a private. Notice that you must stress that you will ask them for a private. If you simply say "I'd like to talk to you", they might think you are going to just BS and not come over. This does not work in clubs where the dancer only goes on stage once every 6 hours.

The second way is to tip the waitress to tell the dancer to come to you. This is your last resort. Sometimes, this will not work because the dancer feels like you should do your own dirty work. The important feature of this method is to tip the waitress big. If the waitress thinks you're cheap, she will tell the dancer that message.

On this subject of interacting with dancers, talking to a dancer that you are not interested in getting dances from is not always bad. As long as you tell her that you are not going to get a dance, it's up to her if she wants to talk to you. Some dancers are bored and will chat. Why is this good? Because the other dancers see that you are "OK" and will come over later.

If you become a "regular" and dancers get to know you, it will become increasingly easier for you to get dances from the ones that you want. They will recognize you from another trip, some will remember that you got dances from them or others and come over hoping to get dances from you.

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How do you say "No" to a dancer asking for laps?

I've been in the exact same situation many times. I've tried different tactics with different results. I've told the dancer that I don't get lap dances. Later, I ended up getting a dance from another dancer. This turned out to be a really bad technique because the first dancer came back to me and called me a liar.

In the few times when the dancer was not only being a pest but had an attitude to go along with it, I bluntly told her she was not attractive to me. The problem with this is that she might go to the dressing room and give you a bad rep before you talk to any other dancer.

I've also tried the less blunt but more aggressive "no" with some sugar on it, "No thanks. I appreciate you asking but I really don't want a dance." with extra emphasis on the "really". This usually works but I've had dancers come back and joke around with, "Are you *really* sure?"

If the same girl keeps coming back, sometimes I even chuckle a little and smile. Sometimes, that will give her the clue that I think it's getting ridiculous. Some dancers NEVER get the hint or they just forget who they asked and keep asking like a robot.

The bottom line here is: there's no sure fire way without being mean or blunt. Personally, I just keep saying "no" with a smile (like you) hoping she gets the message. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

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How can I find a dancer I used to know?

Not easily. Dancers move often and even change their stage names when they go to new clubs. Many change their hair color, gain or lose weight, or get bigger tops. Even if you have her real name, you will have problems finding her because many dancers don't tell other dancers their real names. Many clubs have policies of not telling customers where a dancer went to because of stalkers.

If the dancer you know has a very distinctive look, birthmark or tattoo, you might ask dancers if they know a dancer with that description. Otherwise, you are probably out of luck. Even then, they might think you are vice or a stalker unless you know them.

Alternatively, you can post a message on my bulletin board under the topic "Dancer Relocation" and cross your fingers and hope that somebody reading this website knows who you are talking about.

How about hiring a private dick?

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Why do dancers use stage names?

For various reasons. Some don't want anybody to know their real name because their families don't know they dance. Others want a distinctive name so that customers will remember them and ask for them. Many simply don't want every Joe to know their name and call it out at the mall.

BTW (by the way), Z Bone is my stage name. My friends call me Z but you can call me Mr. Bone.

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Are dancers self-destructive because of their traumatic past experiences or is it because of the strip club environment?

It's hard to make generalizations but I would say that it's the former more often than not. Usually, the person's self-destructive nature brings them to the strip club. This is not always the case but if you poll all the dancers, often, you will see that most of them had some problems in their life, mainly dealing with some form of abuse from the father figure.  The University of Pennsylvania did a psychiatric study and found that 60-80% of nude dancers were raped or sexually abused as children.

However, I have seen some people get into the business who are relatively normal and just needed money for school. In these cases, the environment often starts to cause problems after a while. If they continue to dance for more than 6 months, the likelihood of being affected increases.

Again, these are generalizations and not all dancers are this way.

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What do dancers do when their dancing days are over?

It varies greatly. The dancers who were doing it temporarily while they were going to college move on to their "real" jobs when they graduate. The dancers who dance for a long time until they cannot make money dancing anymore have the most difficulty switching because they really don't know how to do anything else. They often move to a job in the same industry that is not dancing (e.g. bartending, managing, house mom, selling dancer clothes). Some will marry just about anybody that will get them out of the business and become house wives. Some will take jobs offered by a customer.

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Do dancers "cheat"?

Yes, most. More greenery = better scenery. I was at a topless club in Charleston a while back and noticed that it was very slow. We were the only customers on stage. We sat on the side of the stage opposite the bar and started tipping big. It only took a few seconds before the dancer started to cheat big time. Before long, we were getting a nude dance with extras!

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Out of 10 dancers, how many are sluts?

By "slut", I assume you are using the definition of "promiscuous" as opposed to "prostitute". To answer your question, I would say 1 or 2 are super promiscuous (meaning that they will do almost anybody), 5 are very sexually active, (but will not do customers), 2 are basically normal (sexually active with SO) and 1 is sexually dysfunctional. Younger dancers (16-22) tend to be more promiscuous and less so as they get older. That's just an educated guess and is not based on a scientific survey.

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Are many dancers bisexual or bi-curious?

Yes, IMO, a very large percentage compared to the regular population. Let's face it. If you were a bi-female, or gay, and liked good looking women, where would you work? Me too.

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Can I get a STD from lap dancing?

Pure Lip Believe it or not, I get asked this a lot. Remember that I am not a doctor. Just a wannabe gynecologist. The quick answer is: depends.

If you are getting a normal or low mileage lap dance, your odds of catching something are basically zero. However, if you are French kissing the dancer, licking her private parts, letting her lick your gameboy, or some form of actual sex, then the odds will increase dramatically.

If you are specifically worried about AIDS, you are less likely to catch it unless you or she has a cut or an open sore. Does this mean you can't catch AIDS this way? No. The odds of winning the Lotto is low too but people still play. They play because there is that small chance.

The thing to remember is this. If the dancer is doing these things with you, the odds are, she is doing them with other customers. That increases the chances of her having some type of STD that she may pass on to you.

Have fun, but play safe.

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Do dancers go out with customers?

Some do but this is the exception and not the rule. Some clubs have more relaxed rules about dating customers. Some clubs will fire any dancer that is caught dating a customer. Generally speaking, there isn't much a club can do about what a dancer does on her free time. But keep in mind that talking about going out with a dancer at the club could get her in trouble.

The question to ask is, "Why do you want to go out with a dancer?" IMO, going out with dancers is overrated. Dancers are people, just like you and me. They have their problems like anybody. There's really no reason to go out with dancers except for the following benefits:

  • Don't have to stand in line outside dance clubs.
  • Cause accidents on the freeway by having them moon other drivers.
  • Never have to buy CDs. Just borrow theirs.
  • Get free food by betting your friends that she will flash the waiter.

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What kind of guys are dancers looking for?

I often get similar questions like, "Can I ask a dancer for her phone number?" Of course, the answer is yes. Nothing stopping you from asking. But think about how many others are doing the same thing. Most dancers are pretty tired of that stuff.

Are the dancers looking for a guy with money, security, looks, or power?

Depends on the dancer but all of the above doesn't hurt. Many have boyfriends, others are married, others are single mothers, and others are just single. As in other occupations, the good lookers usually have a waiting list and they are picky. The ones who are not with somebody are either scammers, hustlers or a little too screwed up in the head to maintain a relationship. Those are generalizations and there are many exceptions. If you just want sex, that's a lot easier to get. If you want a relationship, you'd better ask yourself if that's what you really want. Then, ask again. Then ask why.

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Can I get a dancer's phone number?

You can ask.  Some will give it to you, and others won't.  Although some dancers will give out fake numbers, many will give you a number that is their answering service. If you call, they will have a message indicating when they will be working. If you are a big spender, it would not be unusual for a dancer to give you their number so that you can call and let them know you are coming to the club.  More often, the dancer will ask for your number so she can call you to let you know when she's working.

If you have a favorite dancer, I suggest you ask her what the best way is to find out when she works. She may tell you that she has a regular schedule. That would be your opportunity to ask if you could have her phone number so that you can call and check her schedule. It doesn't hurt to ask.

The next question I get is, "Does the club care?"  Although there are some clubs that have rules against it or at least discourage dancers from giving out their phone number, it's impossible to enforce. Most clubs just leave it up to the dancers discretion. Frankly, the odds of getting their phone number is directly proportional to how much money you give them.

And the last follow up question is, "Can I get in trouble?"  The customer can never get in trouble for asking or giving out a number. In some cases, the dancer might get in trouble for giving out their number but never for receiving a number from the customer.

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Are some dancers prostitutes?

Are some waitresses prostitutes? Probably. There are definitely some percentage of dancers who are also prostitutes. And in the same way that you could go to the mall and find a prostitute if you look hard enough, you will probably find one at a strip club as well. This does not change the fact that the strip club is for the enjoyment of watching dancers strip and not picking up prostitutes.

Having said that, if that's what you are into, I'm sure your hit rate would be higher than at a fast food restaurant. The reason is because there are a high number of attractive women there that are used to dealing with male customers and money. In the same way that the hit rate for models and actresses are also pretty good comparatively.

One word of caution. Dancers who prostitute on the side are usually more expensive than normal prostitutes and are also looking for Sugar Daddies. If you are not ready for this type of monetary action, be careful and be ready. Good luck.

I am pretty tired of answering similar questions, asking how to pick up dancers, how to find out if they are prostitutes, etc. My short answer to all of these questions: If you have to ask, you won't understand my answer.

My suggestion for you in this area is to save time and money. It would be much easier, faster and cheaper to read the LA XPress ads.

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What are privates?

When a dancer uses the term "privates," she is referring to an outside encounter. Over the years, this has become more common and now a FAQ.  Normally, most customers will assume this means some type of sexual encounter. However, the specific type of encounter will depend on the situation that is agreed on. If specifics are not agreed on prior to the encounter, don't be surprised if the meeting is only a high mileage lap dance at her place or yours.

Some dancers may try to charge more than the club, because you are getting the privacy and convenience of getting the lap dances at your own home or hers. However, since there is no middle man (the club) taking money from each lap dance, the cost should be no more than at the club. The tipout the club would normally get should be more than enough extra for the dancer.

In the case where you are getting more than what you can get at the club, the cost should be negotiated prior to the encounter and expect to pay more than at the club. This is because sometimes the dancer will be expecting a large amount of money and you may not want to pay it. This could lead to an argument, or at the minimum, an awkward situation which may lead to not being able to see this dancer again.

As in any negotiation situation, be clear on what you want and what you are willing to pay for it. If you are trying to get a dancer to do more than what she is willing to do, it will usually cost a lot more than what you can get from a prostitute. However, the good news is, if you've already established some type of connection with her at the club, you will probably get a better encounter than you would from a prostitute that you don't know.

This form of entertainment can be fun but be very careful. There's an infamous case of a porno actress in Florida who did "privates," and would send people to burglarized the house after she cased the place during her privates. There are also cases where the "driver" comes in with the dancer and proceeds to rob the occupants instead.  In a more recent case, the "driver" beat the customer to death and was later charged with murder.

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How can I ask a dancer if she'll do "privates"?

If you don't know the dancer, she will probably not agree to such things for her own protection as well as because of the possibility that you might be vice. Either she will bring up the subject indirectly or you can bring it up after you get to know her a little. There are definitely cases where this does not apply and the way you look and act can also determine your hit/miss ratio.

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How can I get a dancer for a private bachelor party?

Depending on how much time you have to setup your party, I'd suggest one of the following methods:

  1. Get party supplies here! One way is to call one of the stripper services available (try my links section). The advantage for this method is if the dancer does not show up, you can call the service and they will send another one. Most services have a book of pictures for you to choose your dancer from. Also, it's unlikely that the dancer will jack you. The disadvantage is you don't get to see the dancer in action prior to the party.

     

  2. Go to a strip club and find a dancer or dancers that you like and ask them if they do private parties. The advantage is that you get to talk to the potential dancer to see if you like her. The disadvantage is she might not show up. This can be a buzz kill for the party. You could minimize this possibility by going out to find the dancers shortly before the party and bringing them to the party straight from the club. This will cost since they will have to tipout the club to leave. Another disadvantage is that since you don't know this dancer, she could turn out to be connected to a home invasion jacker crazy boyfriend. Play safe and be careful out there.

     

  3. Ask the manager or DJ at the club if they could hook you up. Chances are that unless they know you, they will not want to take the responsibility of hooking you up in case you turn out to be a serial killer.

There are other ways but if you have to ask this question, you won't understand my answer.

Regardless of how you end up finding a dancer, I highly recommend that you get a small hotel suite to do that party in, unless you want your house trashed or jacked later.

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Should I get an escort for my private bachelor party?

I've never tried getting an escort for a bachelor party but I would imagine that it would not go over too well because escorts often don't want to be seen by too many people, and certainly don't want their pictures taken. Whereas, bachelor party dancers and porno stars don't mind pictures or even video. Also, escorts do NOT know how to give lap dances. They can barely have good sex. So I would stay away from that unless you know the person.

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What's the going rate for a private party?

Like anything else, every dancer is different and prices are negotiable. However, because of stiff competition in LA, the going rate seems to have dropped to about $100 per hour. Of course, quality and price go hand in hand. A real "feature" (read porno actress) can cost up to $400 per hour. You can usually get a reduced rate for multiple hours if you tell her your party will be tipping her also.

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